everybody's wondering, "why can't you be the same as them?"
I live like I want to, like how she taught me to be
your phone number is just one thing that means nothing to me
and the reason I seem so happy is simply 'cause, I am
and you stare and ask me about stupid things
that I don't give a damn about anymore
I've got my mother's hips
yeah, they're eight miles wide
and they're not something that I flaunt
but they're not something that I hide
you think that I'm a fool
'cause I don't wanna live your way
well, I think that you're the fool
everybody's asking me, "why you gotta be so strange?"
everybody's wondering, "why can't you be the same?"
everybody's asking me, "damn girl, what's your name?"
and I'm sorry I just don't care to answer you
'cause this is not my thing, to be so free with you
I learned more than I ever expected from you
you hold me at arms length and yet want me to see you through
you're laughing, I'm crying, I'm drying the tears from my eyes
and you still want me to sing you my sweet lullaby
~ Brenda Weiler
Rob included this picture in one of his emails yesterday. It reminded me of the song above, which was a favorite at that time ("the reason I seem so happy is simply 'cause, I am" was once my email signature). It also made we want to start walking again. But I didn't. Instead I ate some kind of cool-whip/yogurt dip with vanilla wafers at Amy's house. Oh, well. I'm resigned to the fact that I'll never be a size 8... but being a light 12 again would be nice. Will it be back to counting Weight Watchers points and enduring Walk-Away-the-Pounds videos (mmm... sisters in sweat!)? Perhaps. But I'd prefer to naturally subscribe to the "eat-real-food-and-keep-on-moving" philosophy. I don't. I grew up on processed foods. They were cheap. Therefore I have a nurtured affinity for them. But I also really, really like my Irish Girl t-shirt and dearly miss being able to wear it. I need proper motivation. I need my de-cluttering exercise to be over and done with (time to stop scoopin' out the bath water and just get rid of the whole tub... baby and all). Organization always seems to provide me with both sanity and motivation. Water. Fiber. Nutrients. Movement. It's not that difficult, so why is it?